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A blog about infertility, adoption,and adoption loss which has finally led to a beautiful miracle who was worth smiling for."Strength and dignity are her clothing, And she smiles at the future."Proverbs 31:25

Saturday, July 23, 2011

Weeping Willow

I've always like the weeping willow tree. For a short time we had a weeping willow at a place that I lived when I was a kid. We moved after only a few months, but I still remember playing under the tree. It was like I was deep in an enchanted forest or something. Tonight, I sort of feel like a weeping willow. The last few days I've been living somewhere between denial and anger. Tonight I've started the sad part of the process. The grieving. True, there is no confirmation that Kmom has changed her mind; but in my heart I know it is merely a matter of time. How odd to grieve someone I never had. A baby that I never held. A love that I have never expressed. But, I do. My heart hurts .... oh God it hurts!

3 comments:

Sarah said...

Oh you poor thing! I was just reading your posts to catch up. What a thing to go through. I will be thinking and praying for you guys, as well as kmom. Hang in there - thinking of you!

Ashley said...

I love weeping willows, too! My heart hearts for you. Praying!

The Raudenbush Family said...

Just read a few of your more recent posts. My heart aches for you - particularly given today's date. May He bring you supernatural peace tonight and as you wait for more information.

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